hey strangers,

I’ve not posted in 3 days , oops , I’m so sorry. I have been so busy with things such as school work and I recently went to see my uncle for the first time in hospital which was an emotional time. I haven’t felt like writing to you guys. It wouldn’t have been worth it….

anyway I’ve met a new guy he’s so lovely and actually makes me feel wanted but the problem is I always feel self concious. See the thing is I get a type of mind set where all I think about is the why’s…. why would he want to talk to someone like me? why would he even want to look at me? why is he messaging me?

Then it goes to the is he’s… is he using me? is he just getting a laugh out of me? is he just taking the piss? It happens to me every time. it gets me down so much 😦 …. I think its cute though having someone who may actually want you in their lives it just makes me over think things. I always do it.

He asked me to go out with him tomorrow…. but I said no… I was too scared to be with the people he’s friends with. they just make me feel uncomfortable – they don’t know me that well , only from school. I just didn’t feel ready to go somewhere like that with them. I might still ask if he’s out at the same time to meet up it would be lovely.

I’m meant to be going out with kitty. she’s very poorly though 😦 , so am I to be honest I’m so tired and have tummy ache constantly 😦 ouch ffs. I hope sleep helps us both get better. get well soon kitty. If we do go out I’m going to be taking pictures for the blog 🙂 nice ones of the river 🙂 they will be great. cant wait to show you so I hope it works out.

thank-you , goodnight xx